When Your Body and Soul Are Both Tired

There are seasons when faith and fear seem to fight for the same space inside you. I’m in one of those seasons now. Recently, my tongue began swelling again — a symptom that feels both foreign and familiar. For those who don’t know, I’m a brain-tumor survivor. Years ago, a schwannoma pressed against my brain stem, paralyzing my left vocal cord and jugular vein. The surgery that saved my life also left me with dysphonia (a voice disorder) and dysphagia (difficulty swallowing).

Most days, I live gratefully. But lately, as the swelling returns and my speech becomes harder, the gratitude feels mixed with grief. I woke up from a dream about my first foster sons — I miss them deeply. I cried about them, about my body, about not knowing what’s next.

Faith Meets Emotion Mind

In The Mind-Spirit Bible Practice, I write about Emotion Mind — that space where feelings flood so fully that logic can’t breathe. Right now, my Emotion Mind is loud: fear, sadness, exhaustion, longing.

In my book, I describe Wise Mind — the meeting place between truth and emotion, where the Spirit of God whispers beneath the noise. Wise Mind isn’t about suppressing emotions; it’s about inviting God into them. This is where I’m practicing right now. Not teaching, not preaching — practicing.

The Refuge of Psalm 62

“Pour out your heart to Him, for God is our refuge.” — Psalm 62 : 8

That verse doesn’t demand composure. It gives permission to bring your whole, trembling heart into God’s presence.

When I pour out my heart, it doesn’t sound polished — it sounds like tears, whispered prayers, sometimes even silence. But God receives every bit of it. He isn’t waiting for me to get over my feelings; He’s inviting me to experience His refuge within them.

The Practice

Here’s how I’m practicing the Mind-Spirit Bible rhythm tonight:

1. Acknowledge the emotion: Fear. Sadness. Gratitude. Hope.

2. Breathe and anchor: “I am safe in this moment. God is here.”

3. Integrate truth: “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” (Psalm 73 : 26)

4. Release: “Even here, God is doing something sacred.”

If you’re in a season where your body or soul feels weary, I hope my story reminds you: You can feel deeply and still trust deeply. Faith and feelings don’t have to compete — they can collaborate.

Reflect & Practice

• What emotions are loud in your life right now?

• What truth might God be whispering beneath them?

• How can you let both exist — emotion and truth — without judgment today?